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  Topic Review (Newest First)
08-22-2019 06:01 PM
dsurley PM sent............
been there my man
08-22-2019 05:17 PM
Stratman With the mixed signals your son is getting from you both, it only adds to his dilemma. Even though he may not admit to having one.
You must have unity dealing with this problem or I wouldn't expect it to improve.
Good luck BD!
Strat
08-22-2019 08:33 AM
budoka I'm not in any position to guide or council on this. However, I have to agree that it needs to be an all in for the three of you together. Whatever way it plays out, you need each other's support all along the way.
08-22-2019 08:03 AM
BigDaddy Thank you everyone!
08-22-2019 08:01 AM
Two Wheel Wing I agree with the "united' front. If you are not both on the same page he will continue to play one against the other. He needs help and rehab. Not from someone who will tell him it's "ok" or "don't worry", but someone who will tell him like it is. That there consequences to his actions.

As far as helping him, for example, Tell him when you/wife are going to the store and ask if he wants to go along. Make him adhere to your schedule, not the other way around.

I don't know if you are affiliated with a church, but sometimes there is help there.
08-22-2019 05:40 AM
dan18960 I agree with Eric - and maybe part of coming to being a united front might be for you and Sue to seek some counseling.

It doesn't have to be marriage counseling either. Sometimes getting a neutral listening ear can be all that is needed to hear the other person and LISTEN to them. Hearing and listening are often thought to be interchangeable - but you can hear a loud scream but that doesn't mean you understood the loud volume - but listening provides the ability to think and weigh the words being said.

Also being too strict (often a view rather than a fact) can be a road block to seeing "the love". Maybe you might think you are strict and Sue is viewing it as anger and overbearing - and as such an unreasonable action towards her son.

I am wondering if the father has ever had a role in the son's life? Even though my ex-wife and I divorced ages ago - we have always had a good and (most of the time) healthy relationship with OUR sons.
08-22-2019 04:56 AM
Chopin I feel the pain. Been through it, still going through it at age 36. When the heroin came in a few years ago it all went to hell-in-a-hen basket. Looking back, my wife and I felt powerless; and hope for tomorrow made a good supper but a poor breakfast.

Sent from my E6830 using Tapatalk
08-22-2019 03:05 AM
Luv2fish Sent you a private message.
08-21-2019 10:16 PM
Ron Robertson Has he ever been tested for Hypoglycemia. That can cause a lot of behavioral problems.????
08-21-2019 10:03 PM
Eric For me.................it is a case of a united front from with you and Sue. Otherwise you will be the loser. You need to put your thoughts to Sue without any put downs. And be a strength for Sue in the background. It is just as hard for her even when she is taking a different tack to you.
Good luck with this. E&V
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