An old Irish guy "Patrick" is sitting watching TV with his wife Maude one night. After the evening new. Maude says Patrick Lad, I'm going to bed, you coming along.
No" says Patrick I'm going to watch a bit more Telly.
After a bit he goes out into the hallway and can hear gentle peaceful breathing of Maude in a sleep. Quietly he slips out the front door and heads to the Rams Head Pub just four doors down the street. When he enters the Pub there's a round of Evening Patrick from the crowd in the Pub. When he gets to the bar somebody buys him a drink and it gets started. He buys a round and someone else buys a round and so it goes for a couple of hours.
Soon it's midnight and Patrick figures he better get home while he still can. He tries to stand but falls to the floor "Saints preserve me he says" but everybody is busy and he goes unnoticed as he crawls to the door. He pulls himself up and steps out side and again falls down. So he crawls down the sidewalk to his front door, where he pulls himself up again, and again falls down when he steps inside. Knowing he had better not wake up Maude, he crawls into the Living room and pulls himself up into a chair, figuring in the morning he'll just tell Maude he fell asleep watching TV.
In the morning Maude wakes him with "WAKE UP YOU OLD DRUNK"
Maude My Love, how can you say such a thing about the Love of your life. says Patrick
They just call from the Rams Head. You left your wheel chair again!!!!!